there's no weakness in forgiveness, saber

[SAFFRON COLETTE CASTILLO]

it was in your eyes, i will be just fine,
THERE IS NO WEAKNESS IN FORGIVENESS

People have always said, ever since the beginning of time, that even if the bruises fade away the pain remained the same didn't they? That was what Saffron had always heard. And now, for the first time in her life, she could vouch for that. It didn't matter how many times it had happened already and the bruises that had faded by now, she remembered every strike against her, every little word that was said about her when he didn't get what he wanted. It wasn't even about one thing either. If his mood was just right, he would change, completely in what seemed like mere seconds. Anything could start him, and after he was started, it seemed like nothing could stop him. Not even the poor girl whimpering, or crying for him to stop. Nothing worked, when Saber was mad, someone was going to pay, it just so happened that saffron was around each and every time.

It was all a mistake, she kept telling him. That he didn't mean it and that he loved her no matter what. She knew that, and she knew he was telling the truth, he loved her, he did. She could see it in his eyes when he told her so, and the feelings she had when she was around him was enough to make the girl dizzy each time. She didn't doubt him in his love for her, but she knew that it had to stop. If it didn't, the girl wouldn't be happy, and without him she wouldn't be either. Honestly, it was a lose, lose situation, there was nothing in her power she could do about it either. Well there was, but she wasn't about to go that far. She would never leave saber, it wasn't about to happen, she refused. As she had told him time and time again, he was her everything, and without him, there was no saffron.

She knew it was a little much and she knew she was a little young to say and think such things. It didn't matter to her, in her mind set, love was love no matter what the situation. And in this particular situation, nothing else mattered to her then being married to him. And she would be, soon. It all depended on her, she just had to sit Saber down and talk about the wedding, which she planned on doing today. The girl was already engaged to him, and she couldn't wait to be Mrs. Deville, the very word thrilled her to her core. She wanted to be with him forever, and becoming his wife, she would be able to do just that. He had promised her that he would never lay an angry hand on her again, and being the girl she was, she believed him. She was gullible, and she still hadn't recognized it. But honestly, she knew he could change, he just had to have the motive, and now he did.

She had faith in him, he had to be able to control his anger, especially if she were to live with him and be his wife and.. further down along the road have children, he surely couldn't lay a hand on them could he? Maybe the girl was over analyzing, but at this point, she couldn't help it. Could she really believe that he had it in him to stop? Had he not told her that it would be the 'last time' many times before? She knew he had, but she didn't want to think about that, her mind was set on the future, and seeing him today. She couldn't wait to plan this thing out for it to finally happen, and this was what needed to happen, and soon. She was tired of putting it off further and further, she was more then ready to be married to him and be happy. She just hoped he felt the same. He had always been a bit.. removed when they had talked about it, but she knew he was just as exited as she was.

It was a little different this time though, they were unlike anyone. She had been the one to ask. In fact, it was right after she had taken a hit that night as well, it had been the worst yet, and still, she had found it in herself to ask him to be hers.. forever. Maybe it was some wrong conclusion she had drawn to think that he would never do it again, maybe.. just maybe. She wouldn't be able to tell until that day came. And she couldn't help but be more then ecstatic about it. Bringing out her phone from her back pocket she sent a quick text his way, telling him that it was a nice day out in the courtyard of Kingsford College, and that he should meet her there, just to talk. It was a good idea to her, and the weather was just perfect. It would be a good day, she knew for sure. Sitting down under the shade of a tree the girl leaned her back against the bark and rested her head against it, her eyes closing softly as she waited for him.

TAG saberrrr / believer<3
WORDS 868
MUSE a ton.
NOTES i.. could have written way more -.- i had to stop myself xD

[SABER ERYX DEVILLE]

WHEN YOU'RE AT THE END OF THE ROAD & YOU LOST ALL SENSE OF CONTROL ,
& your thoughts have taken their toll

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Since the first time he had layed a hand on her, he couldn't get it out of his mind. Of course he knew it was wrong, that it was terrible and that he shouldn't have done it in the first place. He wasn't even sure why he had done it in the first place, but he had. He had hit her, more than once too, and now he could never take it back. That was what bothered him the most. The fact that no matter what he did from now on, he could never take it back. That one moment. Saber could never completely get it out of his mind, no matter how hard he tried. Even if he almost forgot at times, something would always end up reminding him.

Honestly, he couldn't remember the exact number of times he had hit her. He didn't want to, really. But some nights, he could remember perfectly. They stuck in his mind, he could remember them as if they had just happened. When he closed his eyes, he could see her, hear her, basically pleading for him to stop. He never did, no matter how much she cried or whimpered or pleaded. He was quick to anger and hard to calm down, and he knew that. Never before though had he gotten so mad that he had even thought about laying a hand on Saffron. Until a few weeks ago, when one night for some reason, he had snapped. He had hit her, without even a second thought. And after that night, it seemed to happen more and more often.

Every single time though, once he had calmed down, and she ended up being hurt again, he would start apologizing. Every time be promised her he wouldn't do again, that he was sorry and he loved her, that this would be the last time. And every time, it wasn't. He would end up hurting her again next time he was mad. Throughout all of it though, the one thing he always meant, was that he loved her. He really did, with all of his heart. No matter what he did, his love for her stayed the same. Saber really didn't know what he would do without her, she made him feel complete. Whenever he was with her, he felt whole, like everything was alright again.

He hated having to think about being without her at all. It seemed almost impossible to him. After seeing her almost everyday, he couldn't even begin to imagine not ever seeing her again. And because of that, he was also trying much harder lately. Trying to not get mad so easily, and to certainly not hit her when he was. Just the thought of her leaving him was enough to make him try harder than normal.

The one night he could remember more than all the others was the one that happened most recently. It was quite possibly one of the worst and best nights of his life. The beginning of the night he still hated to think about though. He had beat her again, the worst he ever had. Now when he thought about it, he couldn't believe he had done it. Especially because he could hardly remember the reason why he was so mad. But once he had finally calmed down once again, the night changed drastically. Because by the end of that one single night, they were getting married.

It wasn't exactly typical though. Instead of him asking her, it was the other way around. Almost right after he had hit her, no less. Saber would never refuse being married to her though. He had been pretty happy since then thinking about it. Even though he was happy and excited about it, he couldn't help being a bit nervous. He knew he wanted to be with her forever, that was no question, but the thought of actually being married was slightly nerve wracking to him. So even though he couldn't wait for the wedding to happen, he had been putting off any planning for a while. He knew it in the back of his mind, even though he didn't really want to admit that he was nervous at all.

That day though, when he got a text from Saffron saying to meet her at the Kingsford College courtyard, he was in a rather good mood. And thinking about seeing her that day made him smile. He loved spending time with her, and that day was no exception at all. So he got ready quickly, and headed to the school. Admittedly, he hadn't been there too many times. Not having finished high school, he had no reason to spend time at the college, and never really did. But it didn't take him very long to get to the courtyard anyway.

Once he was actually there, he glanced around quickly, his eyes scanning for Saffron. Grinning again when he saw her, he walked over quickly and sat down next to her. Leaning in a bit to kiss her cheek quickly, he chuckled softly. "Why hello there gorgeous." he said, laughing again and smiling widely at her.

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TAGGED !? saffron/ kaylaaa. <3 !?
HOW MANY !? 858 !?
LISTENING TO !? i never told you what i do for a living - my chemical romance !?
LYRICS BY !? GREEN DAY - 21 GUNS !?
CREDIT TO !? RORA @ C. AFFAIRS

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[SAFFRON COLETTE CASTILLO]

it was in your eyes, i will be just fine,
THERE IS NO WEAKNESS IN FORGIVENESS

Saffron was obviously not the smartest girl around, she knew that. But she was smart enough to know that Saber loved her. It wasn't hard to see and she knew that he was the one for her deep down in her heart, how could he not be? They had been together for quite a while now and neither of them had been displeased with the other enough to call things off, the marriage or the relationship. She needed him, and she had since she was younger. He was her everything, her best friend. He would protect her if anything went wrong, the only problem was... sometimes he was the problem. But she didn't think of that often, she pushed it from her mind as often as she could, and usually it worked unless they started to disagree on something. It was why the girl agreed with him so often, another reason being that she hated disagreeing with the boy.

Every time the girl chose to forgive him, every bruise being covered up with make up or hidden by her clothing each time a new one 'appeared'. She was a pro at it by now. There had been that many that she had covered up now, she was sure that there wasn't a place that she couldn't cover up if she tried. She had had them everywhere. Specifically she had remembered a time where it had been on her face and her wrists. She had worn a lot of bracelets the next few days and decided to get a bit more dressed up to wear a little more make up, they were pretty much covered. Although the girl never really went out much because of her heart condition, she couldn't, she wasn't able to. It was hard enough to breath without the exertion of walking or running somewhere, it was an accomplish to get to the courtyard even today, but she was glad that she could. This was an important day in the girls life; she was planning her own wedding.

A smile grew on her face as she spotted him, looking just as good as ever in her eyes. Walking over to her at a rapid pace he sat next to her, grinning just as wide as she was. Saffron was ready for the day that they would be married, no matter how many people disagreed with them and told them that they were stupid, she knew it would be the best decision of her life. Being with him... it was just right. And she wouldn't let anyone else tell her differently. They were perfect for each other and they both knew that much. Saffron giggled softly as he leaned in to give her a kiss on the check, leaning in closer and scrunching her nose before sighing happily. He was in a good mood, which seemed to be happening more often lately. She wasn't complaining though, it was a very good thing, especially in her case. Saber! she said excitedly, glancing down quickly at some papers she had brought for him to look at and decide with her about.

She couldn't lie, the girl was nervous, and she wouldn't really mind if he knew that, in fact he seemed nervous as well, which made her slightly more at ease. Sighing softly the girl bit her lip, glancing up at him for a moment and smiling before her eyes were down cast again, looking at her things, this is kind of a lot to plan.. i understand that.. she said, nodding softly. I just want to get some of the main things finished, you know? like.. colors.. and where we want it and all.. she said, still not looking at him. Why she was so nervous she would never know, it was probably just the fact that it was getting real for her. She couldn't wait, but she was also scared out of her mind, and she had every right to be.

TAG saberrrr / believer<3
WORDS 663
MUSE good<3
NOTES hey look, a shorter post c: